Over and over again I am confronted by the same statement when meeting with a client.. I just need to confirm with the minister of finance before I can give the go ahead.

So minister, this bit of satire is for you (and ladies please pass along)!

I will firstly appeal to your logical brain by stating the following:

1. Decorated homes sell faster and for better values.

People want to buy a lifestyle.  When they walk into a property that is well decorated, it creates something that they want to aspire to.  A want… Thats why smaller properties often sell for greater values, because they are better decorated, with a better use of space.  Look at all the areas in your city that have shown massive increases in value… is it the older areas with the big dated homes, or the trendy areas where small properties have been refurbished?

2. Adding square meterage does not always increase value.

Men look at the numbers… what is the Rand value per square metre in the area, therefore by adding this 50m2 TV room I have immediately added major value onto the property.  I challenge that… Because when I walk into your lovely new large TV room, and I see two postage stamp couches and a coffee table and the 70″ TV which was completely justifiable, I see wasted dead space that I am having to pay for.  So plan any extension carefully to get the most bang for your buck, and get the most use out of the space.

And now I am going to appeal to your emotional brain:

1. A decorated bedroom statistically increases your chances of getting lucky.

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Women like to feel sexy in the bedroom.  It is the whole silk vs cotton thing.  So if you concede and let her buy the high thread count Egyptian cotton bed linnen, she will want to spend more time in bed statistically increasing your chances tremendously.  A good nights rest will make her feel more energetic, soft lighting next to the bed will make her feel sexy, and those feather down cushions will prevent any future headaches.

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2. If she loves her gadget filled, inspirational kitchen, cooking will become a passion.

Women love watching cooking shows, but what a downer when they see Jamie Oliver rinsing his fresh herbs from his indoor planters in his prep bowl cleverly designed to be next to his wooden counter top, and she has to return to her grubby 70’s kitchen that came with the house, but had to wait  to be fixed because we needed a bigger TV room to fit the new TV.  Endless trays of gourmet meals could be a renovation away… think about it…

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3. Your wife will literally become hotter if your house looks like it comes out of the pages of a magazine.

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Have you seen the women in Decor Magazines?  HOT! Why? Women form an emotional attachment to anything pretty, and brings out their inner competitive streak.  Dresses, shoes, their hair etc.  If they buy a new dress, immediately they need to up the ante on the shoes, the hair, the nails the make-up etc. The same will happen when you allow her to decorate her home.  Suddenly she will feel the need to dress up to match her home… she cannot insult her beautiful new leather chesterfield couch with a velour track-suit and hair in a scrunchie!  Blasphemy! Decorating your home will literally make your wife hotter… FACT!

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4. Leverage

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Now this needs to be kept in the bag only as a last resort, else it will lose its power and effectiveness.  There are also limited lives on this ‘Get out of jail free’ card, so use them sparingly.  But should you one day, have unfortunately messed up to catastrophic proportions, you could casually slip into the argument that everything you do, has always been to make your wife happy – using the beautifully decorated home as a prime example. Your slight indiscretion was a lapse in judgement, and completely isolated, and will never happen again.

Remember: Happy Wife… Happy Life! 🙂

AH

 

Posted by:Andrew Hector

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